oh, okay. whatever

There really isn’t a ton we can say about this game. Pens had a dominant first period, kind of fell off, Sabres took the fuck over.
If you Google the babySwede that the Sabres started in goal, Google initially believes that you have typed incorrectly and meant to search for:
enroth
The Jonas Brothers.
Also Comrie played tonight because of his dad. Cough.

No clue. Not a lot to say about tonight, because not a lot happening. But I mean, I guess we can roll out the red carpet. I guess.

MOST FAIL
We miss most of the first period of the game because FSN’s truck had a power outage.
In our minds, Ryan Miller probably snipped the power cord or something and then went out back to smoke a jay and listen to Arcade Fire on his iPod.
Gaustad was a thug, attacked Malkin and tried to fight Talbot. Totally random.
And the press, for some reason, had a major crush on Colin Butler whose name was not said once this evening:

WHO ARE YOU.

In general, nothing really is happening.

SOLE GLITTERING MOMENT OF HOPE
At some point in the last 5 of the first period, Tyler Myers goes for a sandwich.
Sekera totally forgets that the puck is important. Lets Crosby take it in the vicinity of the goal line. Quick pass to the slot, where Pascal Dupuis is racing in on Enroth completely undefended.

Well would you look at that.
1-0 Pens.

BIT OF TRIVIA YOU ARE LEAST LIKELY TO FORGET

Tyler Myers is 6’8″. Bob Errey reminded us approximately five hundred times.
He also watches Desperate Housewives.

MOST INTERESTING CONVERSATION
Bobby: The National Hockey League has made this building so cold. . .it’s really not enjoyable anymore.
Steiggy: THANK GOODNESS FOR THE HOT CHOCOLATE BOBBY YOU HAD DURING THE INTERMISSION

Meanwhile people are attacking each other viciously on the ice. Honest to god nothing is happening. The most interesting thing ever was at second intermission when Potash finished a segment and then went “WHEEE”

BEST EXISTENCE ON DEFENSE
Everyone in the third but especially Fleury since the Sabres didn’t score.

Engelland makes some amazing play on Pominville to prevent a goal. There are no photos. All heroes this game are unsung.
Pens have ridiculous difficulty getting pucks out, and it’s crunch mode. You imagine coming home to Rick Orpik after a bad turnover in your mite game and you see the tired eyes, the piercing stare. You really don’t want this to happen. But the Sabres are pissed and they want everything. We’re flat. We’re we’re we’re


SHUTOUT.
PENS WIN
1-0
ttyl

INDIVIDUAL AWARDS

YEP, STILL A COCK COZY

Thomas Vanek

PRETTIEST

KTang. . .
extremely disinterested girl behind him has no idea what’s going on.

ALTERNATIVE THREE STARS


1. Deryk Engelland. A for Effort.


2. Pascal Dupuis and this awkward picture. Since he scored the goal and all.

3. MAF OBVIOUSLY. because I mean he deserves all the stars.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. We will express what we are Thankful for as people.

milk
Also, Milk.

GO PENS.

Zoë

About Zoë

living in Boston, chronically fussy, fills recaps with references to Robert Scott's last march and literary theory among other things.

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