on the fly

The Hair League page has received its cursory updates. The world is a better place now. Leaderboard is as follows for the top 3 points totals:
1. Tied for first with 170 points: Strudels & Doodles, Alyssa T’s Team, Anna H’s Team.
2. Boyssszz on Ice Yay! with 143 points
3. Frenchiesknowbest and Cookiesworld are tied for third with 140 points.

To calculate your own points total, go to the points/updates page for the screenshot of the player totals.
If you forget who is on your team, e-mail us. Be sure to include your name.

Fun facts:
– the highest-scoring team created by a man is Stache and Patch.
– the highest-scoring players are Pascal Dupuis (72), Maxime Talbot (52), and Brent Johnson (47).
– the highest-scoring team to not have Pascal Dupuis is ranked 21st (John W’s Team)
– the lowest-scoring team consists of Kris Letang, Tyler Kennedy, and Marc-André Fleury.

Fascinating.

Okay. Now moving on to the “what the fuck” portion of today’s post:
You may have heard on the most recent Pensblog podcast that Rob Rossi has some insane article about himself in the Trib. He basically wrote an article about his own face. Like, seriously? Rob Rossi, nobody in Pittsburgh wants to read about your face.

So, we checked Rob Rossi’s biography over at his Chipped Ice blog. Did you know that he managed to make both the “about this blog” and biographical sections about himself? Check it out. (ALSO, LADIES: HE’S SINGLE.)

Now, we come to the real meat of this exposé.
Here is Rossi’s article about Jordan Staal’s freak hand injury sustained in practice, that will keep him out for as many as six weeks. (Interlude: OMG UNCLE JORDY WE MISS YOU PLEASE COME HOME LOVE ZOË KIM AND ANN KTHX) Suffice it to say, this is more an editorial piece than straight newspaper journalism, but okay. We’re getting less strict with our form nowadays in the professional writing world, and this is wonderful. This is grand. However:

Told that center Jordan Staal would play Wednesday night at Dallas, the players tapped their stick blades on the ice at Southpointe Iceoplex.

About 25 minutes later, at precisely 11:44 a.m., a frustrated Staal skated from the surface favoring his right hand — the gloved version of which a puck had caught during an otherwise innocent-looking drill.

“The gloved version of which a puck had caught”??????????????????????????????????????????
Does this sentence make it into the final draft of any article? If you’re fifteen years old writing for the school newspaper about girls’ field hockey? Maybe?
Has the editing staff of the Tribune-Review given up on controlling Rossi’s urges?
Perhaps he has eaten them.

Shero said nobody in the NHL community “will care” about his beleaguered-by-injuries squad.

We “will care,” Rob Rossi. We “promise.”

Go Pens.

Zoë

About Zoë

from Fayette County, living in Boston, chronically fussy. every Penguins season is like Amundsen vs. Scott in my head.

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