PUCK HUFFERS SECOND BIRTHDAY EXTRAVAGANZA

Something that you may have noticed, that we didn’t really have time to notice until just now, is that Puck Huffers is now 2.

We know that we are slovenly two-year-olds. We misbehave, scream, and sit on the floor of the mall in front of the entrance to Bon-Ton when we don’t want to walk anymore.
But we are gracious to those of you who read us, even though we are crazy, inconsistent, and impossible at times.
But I mean, we’re like the Penguins in that way. We can’t help it. Possibly beginning to think that we channel their season performance into our own.
We were born on November 10, 2008. We want to be better as we get older. We are currently opening our suggestion box to you as if it wasn’t open already. Please e-mail us at puckhuffers@gmail.com if you have any ideas or complaints. Basically, we want to hear from you. There are 156 Hair League teams but we do not feel like we know 156 of you! Also, around 500 of you visit us daily. WHO AND WHERE ARE YOU. CAN WE BE FRIENDS. DO YOU KNOW WHERE BOISE IS?
THANK YOU for making our lives better. We love each and every one of you. Always and forever. Like a good cup of coffee on a winter’s day, you keep us warm inside. And yes, that is an intentionally creepy statement.

ON TO BUSINESS
THE HAIR LEAGUE HAS FINALLY BEEN UPDATED.
Sorry for the delay. The leaderboard hasn’t changed, but there are a lot of teams that are definitely within reach of the top spots. It would take just one or two big hair performances from some of the outlying players to totally change this game. Think Jordan Staal when he finally comes back. Think Fleury. Think Craig Adams.
Talbot’s an attention whore so you knew he was going to perform. But we know there are going to be shakeups.

Max offers his expert commentary on Lecavalier, Stamkos, and St. Louis.
Staaaaaaaaaaache.

Question: how many times has the Pens’ problem been “playing 60 minutes”? Even the year we won the Cup?
How hard is it to play 60 minutes of hockey in the NHL? How many other coaches/players say this?
You’ve gotta wonder.
Games against Tampa are like games played in a basement while drunk.
We’ll see who pukes first.

ANYWAY IT’S FRIDAY
How can we permit net-crashing when we want to put pretty much everyone in time out?
Well, some people transcend the usual human limits of selfhood and are beasts regardless of what happens otherwise in the Universe.

EVGENI MALKIN CAN CRASH MY NET

oh come on. this is like a permanent condition, not a weekly gift.

WHY HE IS ALLOWED TO HAVE THIS ENVIABLE HONOR AGAIN
Because the man just does not quit.

You can question his mental state, wonder what’s “wrong” with him this year (and last year) but he tends to play with his whole body and mind. Sometimes this is a poor reflection, sometimes an excellent one, but we can’t think of anyone else who plays hockey this honestly.
Against the Bruins, he looked dominant, he got pissed, he was like a bull being stuck repeatedly by a matador, but he still didn’t die. He comes out every night with his heart on his sleeve, which sometimes means BAM. Big fucking goal. Sometimes it means 2 assists, but a #2 star for just looking like a monster on skates.
Good job, Gene.
We love you.

THE WHOLESOMENESS PART OF IT

malkin_hats

DO YOU LIKE MY NEW HAT(S)


The last time we posted our favorite Brother Steven .gif, the Pens ended up losing.
Brother Steven .Gif #1 is on hiatus until the mojo changes.

What do we need tonight? FLEURY INSPIRATION .GIFS. E-mail them to us. Example:

GO PENS.

Zoë

About Zoë

from Fayette County, living in Boston, chronically fussy. every Penguins season is like Amundsen vs. Scott in my head.

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