henrik lundqvist: a study

Today was a glorious day, thanks to some pretty epic fail by the Flyers. The Rangers achieved a 7-0 win off of 4 goals by Ryan Callahan, and 2 by Mats Zuccarello, and a breakaway goal for Artem Anisimov. And Henrik Lundqvist had the shutout. It was one of the rare occasions when we’re happy to see a big Rangers win, because it makes the gap between the Penguins and the Flyers in the Atlantic Division just a little bit smaller. If the Flyers lose a couple more games and catch up to the Pens in # of games played in the next couple of weeks, it becomes a very tight race between the two teams for the division lead. This seems fairly unbelievable, considering the fact that the Pens don’t have all kinds of offense to rely on anymore, and everyone said the Flyers got all kinds of scary when they got Versteeg. Maybe scary for Peter Laviolette since we don’t assume he likes turnovers in the defensive zone. BUT: this is not the focus of our post.

Rooting for Henrik Lundqvist was certainly a foreign experience. In fact, we’re mostly used to insulting him for looking like Ken and for being easy to exploit short side. But, lots of lady hockey fans are all about Henrik. Rangers fans have to be, since he keeps them in shit sometimes when they don’t deserve it. His shutout today was certainly deserved, since the Flyers played like ass, and when they thought they had something, he gave them no hope. Good job, Henry. We still don’t want to go to bed with you, though. Why is that? We will briefly explore today the question we’ve always had, which is:

He’s conventionally attractive.

Henrik could have easily made it in Swedish daytime television if he didn’t play hockey. He’s slim, tends to wear nice clothes, he’s got a defined jawline and knows how to decorate it with some beard. He’d be very at home in an ad for Express Men. Without this first reason, most girls don’t get started.

The goaltender position is easily romanticized.

What must he think when he’s all alone down there???

They probably don’t realize that he’s batshit (or they do, and totally continue to romanticize it).
We will admit that watching pretty much any goalie (other than resident NHL fatasses Chris Osgood and Jimmy Howard) celebrate a win or lament a loss is kind of entertaining and endearing. You can see that he comes unhinged sometimes, like when he beats the shit out of his goal or swears in his postgame:

He has a Swedish blonde fiance, but she’s pretty nonthreatening and kind of looks like a high school swim teacher.

He probably has cool things to show you in his house.
Like that Olympic gold metal and probably electric guitars.

At least, those are the logical explanations behind this cultural phenomenon. We tend not to go for guys who do the pocket square, but to each her own.

Whatever, we start this in net, so we’re never going to be jealous:

~go pens~


About Zoë

from Fayette County, living in Boston, chronically fussy. Writing about the Penguins, the CWHL/women's hockey, and hockey/sports media criticism.