Welcome to the Recap Lite ™.
As said earlier, we're kinda busy today. But of course, we're both tuned in. Who misses hockey?
Probably only terrorists.
From lounging poolside sipping margaritas to preparing for the Seder like a boss, priority #1 never changes.
So, just in case life got in the way and you missed a few moments, here are the big deets:
Brooks and Sid had a friendly fire incident.
A mean slapper ended up landing the puck in Sid's magnificent face.
We hear that the universal gasp that resulted actually had some strange impact on global warming. Depending on what scientists you talk to, we either saved or killed a whole lotta polar bears.
The first period was pretty good, otherwise, in a rough and tumble kinda way.
Isles outshot us, which is a bummer, but doesn't matter if no one got it in the net.
Which, by they way, no one did
Zoe, that bitch, took the intermission as a chance to jump in the lazy river.
Do you see me hatin'? Because I am.
The second period was all about back and forth penalties. It got a little rough in the last few minutes when Kunitz landed a good check on Bailey, who careened into the boards. Kunit got slapped with a major and a misconduct, which is insane. But mostly we're happy that Bailey got up and skated off, looking like he wouldn't die (potential neck injuries TERRIFY US.)
Matt Cooke is INSANE on the PK. Like, truly insane.
Like, tying up the puck behind the Isles net insane.
Orpik tripped Okposo with 1:55 left on the 5 from Kunitz.
Vokoun is just fucking unreal.
Luckily the 5 on 3 is snakebit by the intermission.
The third period was grueling.
So much action. So many feelings.
SO MANY FEELINGS.
Cooke gets it in the back of the net at long last, and it is excellent.
P.S. Vokoun is a MONSTER.
An absolute MONSTER.
Iggy looks great, if you wondered.
Malkin at one point hit Moulson so hard that he broke his stick.
THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FOR LOOKING AT YOUR SHOES LIKE SOME KINDA HIGH SCHOOL FRESHMAN.
Seriously, what are these guys, hourly?
And then, this happens, and it is the most wonderful thing on earth:
Neal goes to the bench, thanks Geno, and says "I love this."
It's really, really epic.
The clock runs up, and suddenly we're at 15.
The teams between us and the record are garbage, but let's not count our eggs just yet.
Sit back, relax, and enjoy.
Happy Easter, Passover, and Weekend