Pittsburgh Penguins v New York Rangers

forgive me father for i have sinned: rangers series preview

We’re sorry, we just don’t have as many feelings about this series as we did about the Columbus series.  It was a kind of coming out party for the Blue Jackets and we felt the need to honor them, the way you feel the need to give some street cred to a teenager who is becoming less shitty.

The Rangers really aren’t our favorites, obviously.  We’ve never loved them.  We’ve never had to forgive them after they bumped Dad’s car into a fire hydrant but apologized and paid for the repairs with their part-time job wages.  The Rangers aren’t a shitty teen–they’re your least favorite uncle who ruins Christmas by getting loaded and telling you that he doesn’t approve of when you voted for Obama or your gay friends that you invited to brunch or that low-cut top.

what we’re saying is we hate the Rangers and they ruin Christmas.

we barely remember any Rangers games this season, but we know the season series was split 2-2 and everyone was probably a dick about it.

Alain Vigneault is going to be exuding all kinds of emotions.  Henrik Lundqvist is going to be Henrik Lundqvist.

We feel like this series could cause a rapid undoing, kind of like Game 7 between the Caps and Rangers in 2012, but on repeat in the background at a low volume.

TAKE BACK CHRISTMAS

GO PENS

Zoë

About Zoë

from Fayette County, living in Boston, chronically fussy. every Penguins season is like Amundsen vs. Scott in my head.

Quantcast