Denver

PH-Cation: Denver Edition

Sorry that we suck lately.  But it’s for a good reason.  Tomorrow PH Staff will be venturing out to Parts Unknown, Points West, aka Denver, Colorado in preparation for the Penguins @ Avalanche game on Sunday.  The thesis statement of this trip was born at the end of October, when Max Talbot was traded from Philly to the Avs for STEVE DOWNIE, STRAIGHT UP.  Max is in Denver, and now that he has managed to father a child and turn 30 (sure to be a watershed moment in his Quest for Adulthood), we felt we owed him a visit, or really, a surprise inspection.

Other reasons we need to be in Denver:

  • um, do we really have to spell out the first reason?
  • the ridiculous, luscious quality that the restaurant scene seems to have with its fair trade organic vegan gluten-free everything and bottomless mimosa brunches and locally sourced ingredients and orgasms-in-the-mouth
  • There are some fucking mountains there that we feel the need to look at.
  • so yeah this is a pretty complete list

What this means for you:

  • Weird blog updates from the road, mostly.  The last time we did this, in 2009, it was a pre-Instagram America, and we were literally sending TWEETS FROM SMS.  We will uh, attempt to utilize our Instagram, or something.  Maybe not.  We will definitely be tweeting.  At our Twitter.  And maintaining an air of mysteriousness.
  • If you have any tips about how to not faint in front of Gabriel Landeskog, we would appreciate them.  Maybe being near to Max’s tackiness will balance out the energies.
  • We don’t even know if we’re going to be able to watch the Minnesota game.  We might be eating duck fat fries on a velvet ottoman having our mountain man assistants pipe in Mike Lange and make us Old Fashioneds.
  • If the Pens don’t win in Winnipeg tonight, consider this a rescue mission.

anyway our lives are hard but there are mobile apps for WordPress and Tumblr now

Go Pens.  Max, don’t let the drill sergeant see the deplorable state of your locker and bunk.  We’ll be there to help soon.

Zoë

About Zoë

from Fayette County, living in Boston, chronically fussy. every Penguins season is like Amundsen vs. Scott in my head.

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